My Coldplay.com

“In my place, in my place were lines that I couldn’t change … I was lost, I was lost, crossed lines I shouldn’t have crossed … I was scared, I was scared, tired and under-prepared, but I’ll wait for it/If you go, if you go and leave me down here on my own, then I’ll wait for you.” — from “In My Place”

Coldplay’s shimmering sophomore effort (a Grammy winner for Best Alternative Music album) is one of those projects that maddeningly blurs many lines, not just between pop and art, but also between songs of earthly love and spiritual yearning. The average listener will surely lean to the former interpretation because of the vagueness of the lyrics, but as with the music of Lifehouse, there seems to be much more at stake here than a simple unrequited crush.

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Online-only interview: Coldplay’s Chris Martin chats with EW’s Chris Willman about the band’s new album ”X&Y,” the paparazzi, and even strange phenomena involving chickens

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From their beginnings as introspective ’studenty’ whiners, Coldplay are now the biggest band on the planet. We take a sneak preview of their long-awaited third album and uncover the story behind their unlikely success.

The biggest band in the world is sometimes called Coldplay, and sometimes The Fir Trees. The Fir Trees is the name attached to early CDs of the new Coldplay album, so that if they are stolen from cars owned by Parlophone employees or left on public transport by careless journalists, the new owners will not think they have stumbled upon the Holy Grail.

Until they read the back of the accompanying insert. This states that the CD will not play in any computer. If people do find a way of making copies or getting the tracks uploaded on the internet, each track will bear a print of the original owner’s name, and prosecution will ensue for breach of intellectual property. The CD, which is called Album, rather than the real title X&Y, is not removable from the plastic sleeve without first breaking a seal across the top, and the seal has the sort of instructions that only used to appear on dangerous medicines: ‘If this sticker has been broken when received please contact the person who sent it to you immediately.’

Unfortunately, Parlophone would not send me a copy of Album. Recorded postal delivery was not an option, nor was a hand delivery by bike. The CD had to be handed over by a record company employee in person, and at the same time I would have to sign a letter agreeing that I wouldn’t share the contents with anyone. Having agreed to this, an email followed a couple of days later. ‘Dear Simon,’ it began. ‘In the next few days you will receive a watermarked CDR copy of Album by The Fir Trees for advance listening…’ There followed even more instructions about acceptance of terms.

Which leaves anyone who eventually agrees to these conditions, and banishes the dog and children from the room while listening lest they be liable for deportation to Tasmania, rather disappointed that the album is not by The Fir Trees at all, but by an earnest four-piece led by a man whose most enduring contribution to the arts may turn out to be his observations that many relationships are problematic and many things are yellow.

The first time I heard the third Coldplay album, which remains in captivity until 6 June unless someone unauthorised breaks a sticker, it was played at great volume in the office of Dan Keeling, the man who took a chance on the band in 1998. Keeling, not quite 30, is a tall, handsome man with a big jaw and a little beard, and he works in a good-sized office with a view over Brook Green in west London.

This space contains a large desk, a powerful hi-fi, a full rack of vinyl records and CDs, and a poster of the sleeve of the Led Zeppelin album Physical Graffiti. There is also a photo of Chris Martin with big Harpo hair, which is probably how he looked when Keeling first came into contact with him, in the days when he thought he wouldn’t go far.

Keeling began work at Parlophone in the late Nineties as a junior A&R manager. He had come from A&M Records where he was a scout, running round the country seeing a couple of unsigned bands every night in the hope that he would spot the next U2. At most of these gigs, all he saw were mediocre bands, friends of the mediocre band, and other A&R scouts. ‘We all swapped information,’ he told me, ‘because you didn’t want to miss out. When people start talking about one name it gets passed around.’

Not long after he joined Parlophone one name being passed around was Coldplay, a group of students in their final year at University College, London. Keeling obtained a two-track demo tape, which included a song called ‘Ode To Deodorant.’ ‘It was pretty mediocre really,’ he remembers. ‘Sounded like a lot of other bands - nothing that made it special.’ He played the tape at one A&R meeting, and the others in the room were equally dubious. Keeling went to see Coldplay at a new talent night at Cairo Jack’s in Soho. ‘It was about 11 o’clock, and there were about 20 or 30 people there, mostly their friends. I stood at the back. Chris was bubbling away with the charisma that he’s got, but they were a university band just trying to get it together.’ Keeling left without getting a contact for their manager. ‘I didn’t even plan to keep an eye on them.’

A few months later, the band pressed up their own EP and a friend of Keeling’s suggested he should listen again. The improvement was vast. ‘When you sign artists you have to make judgments on the development,’ Keeling says. ‘You don’t want a band who just have two singles on their tape but can’t change creatively. With Coldplay I thought: “Fucking hell - there’s got to be something there.” The only guide I have to what might be successful is whether I want to listen to it myself, and I was playing that EP as soon as I got up in the morning.’

Keeling then began hanging out with them, suggesting they might feel at home represented by the label of other successful guitar bands such as Blur, Radiohead and The Beatles (he may not have mentioned that Parlophone was also in the process of signing Kylie Minogue). He signed them to what he calls an average deal - an advance big enough to support them while recording the first album, Parachutes, with built-in options to release further albums for the rest of their career. The competition wasn’t that fierce. ‘Everyone knew about them, but it wasn’t like there were 10 offers going in. I think it was the tail-end of Britpop, and some people just thought: “Yeah, whatever.” Some dismissed them as being a Radiohead clone, and there was that Alan McGee quote [McGee signed Oasis] about them being bedwetters. People thought they weren’t going to set the world alight, but obviously they’ve developed into something better than that.’

I talked to one A&R man who didn’t sign them. ‘They were good,’ he said, ‘but so fucking studenty. I’ve never met a band so keen to do well in their exams.’

The band didn’t have ‘Yellow’ or ‘Trouble’ when they signed. Parlophone released two EPs before the hits came. Keeling says he was expecting to sell perhaps 100,000 copies of Parachutes, not the 5 million it achieved. ‘I think people may have felt a sort of ownership of the band, it connected with their lives. The lyrics are very personal, emotional, kind of filmic in a way. They’re very ambiguous, but they say a lot while being very ambiguous.’

It is certainly arguable that until he married Gwyneth Paltrow, Chris Martin could quite reasonably pass as everyman; he sounded confused about his life, his hair wasn’t particularly nice, he distrusted Starbucks but wore logo trainers. He sat at a piano and sang plaintive songs which cloaked their banality with intense sincerity.

After stardom he sounded just as insecure, and it made people feel good to hear he was still emotionally adrift, even with - perhaps especially with - a gorgeous, intelligent film star to mother his children. At the record company, Dan Keeling was heading for promotion. ‘To have the success at that level with my first band was a massive rush,’ he concedes. I wondered how people reacted to him when Parachutes wouldn’t stop selling. ‘They probably thought I was a bit of a jammy bastard.’ Some people were happy for him, he thinks, and others were just jealous, particularly other A&Rs.

Coldplay’s second album, A Rush Of Blood To The Head, was less of a wide-eyed assemblage. The title described the way the band liked to work - a slow gestation in which the band wrote prolifically but diddled with the sound until release schedules were scotched and shareholders fretted, followed by a final intense push to make something great.

Dan Keeling said his role was to serve as an adviser. ‘It’s saying: “Maybe this song is better than that song,” or “You’ve written this song before, but you could do something else like this.”‘ He remembers Chris Martin playing the title track down the phone, and hearing the single ‘Clocks’ for the first time in the studio. ‘That was everything you’d ever want in the job,’ he says. ‘Lyrically a great tragedy, you’re lost and the lights go out and you’re travelling through the track, and at the end you’re wanting to come home. Just great, you know?’

The songs ‘Warning Sign’ and ‘The Scientist’ he quantifies as timeless themes freshly wrought: “My life is fucked without you, I miss you.” You can sing that in 10 different and cheesy ways, but the way he sings it he makes it tie in with your life.’ The second album has sold nearly 10 million.

The new record emerged from a process both prolonged and tortuous, this time involving a mid-stream switch of producers. The biggest challenge was to make something that sounded the same but different. Many of the tracks begin gently, rage in the middle, and end up small again, in the way pretentious pomp-rock bands used to do before they were ridiculed.

X&Y is not a ridiculous record, although it has grand aural ambitions. The songs combine bombastic blowouts with quieter spiritual explorations, and even the slower whiny tracks won’t let the listener go without a big emotional shaking. There are several references to things being broken and things that may get fixed. Basically it’s your rich superstars trying to be normal, something U2 toyed with for an album or two, but then decided it was hopeless and went back to wearing the big shades again.

Clearly, many of the songs on X&Y were built for huge live thrashings; Saturday night at Glastonbury this year will be a wonderful communal thing. Miles Leonard, Parlophone’s managing director, told me he hoped it was a landmark record capable of reaching out to a mainstream audience and saying something to each of them - and his shareholders share the vision. (His exact phrase was: ‘I absolutely believe they have made a classic album for ever more.’)

Since Coldplay, Dan Keeling has signed Athlete and emerging bands Clor and Morning Runner, and has learnt one thing above others - you can’t judge a band from where they are when you first hear them. He describes a meeting he had with Franz Ferdinand. ‘We felt they were good, but for whatever reason - maybe just a bad meeting - we didn’t know they were to have the kind of appeal they had. But you should sign music you think is great and try not to second-guess what people want. Once you start doing that you can become a little bit lost.’

Who else apart from Franz Ferdinand? ‘There’s a few. You can’t get it right every time. In fact, most of the time you get it pretty wrong. But just trying to get a few that do OK is all you need.’

The Observer

I’m starting to worry that I’m over-extending my concert karma. With the help of some beautiful, generous people, I managed to snag a seat for Coldplay’s VH1 Storytellers performance tonight at BAM’s Harvey Theater. I was totally beyond psyched out!

According to the pre-show intro, Coldplay is the reason that VH1 has recently brought back the great Storytellers series. Coldplay had contacted the network several months ago saying that they would be coming out with a new album in June and that they’d like to do an episode of Storytellers. The only problem was the program was no longer being done. It was eventually decided that bringing back Storytellers was a great idea, and since then they’ve had DMB, Greenday, and Bruce Springstein tell their tales and sing some songs…but apparently the whole reason the show was revived was because of CP.

Anyway, the theater looked beautiful, with the Coldplay logo made up in a huge light display that sat onstage behind the drum kit, and giant lit up spheres hung from overhead. The guys all wore black tops and bottoms with white sneakers. Jonny had a trucker hat on.

Coldplay did a set of 10 songs, performed in the following order: Square One, Politik, Yellow, Speed of Sound, Warning Sign, Clocks, Scientist, In My Place, Fix You, and the song they wrote for Johnny Cash, Till Kingdom Come, as the encore. The also reshot “Clocks.”

The band sounded amazing. Out of the new songs, “Fix You” is particularly good. And during “Clocks,” Chris does this thing where he does a horizontal 360 while singing one of the verses. (Er…it’s hard to explain.)

Chris joked that the reason why “yellow” was in its namesake song was because he knew there was some word missing from the line “look at the stars/ look how they shine for you/ and all the things you do…” He said he happen to look over to the side and he saw a Yellow Pages sitting beside him. “In an alternate universe, this song would be called ‘Playboy,’” ribbed Martin.

Chris claimed that the song “Speed of Sound” was created out of a failed attempt to do a cover version of Kate Bush’s “Running Up That Hill,” saying that they wanted to recreate the drum part exactly…and also the chords, but Jonny couldn’t get them right. The result was a song that was supposed to be “Running…” but didn’t sound like it.

After the concert was over, Coldplay did a short Q & A with some pre-selected questions from the audience, which I’m assuming were the winning Qs of the Coldplay.com competition. Some of the queries were about how they overcome writer’s block (Chris claimed that he’s never had it, but Will thinks otherwise), if success has made it more difficult to write music (Guy answered that sometimes it does get in the way), and one man asked “Where do you get those vest-shirts?” (a company called Nice Collective from California).

Look out for Coldplay’s Storytellers to air in June!

TheModernAge

He may wear a hoodie from time to time and has a bit of previous when it comes to paparazzi, but for all his rock ‘n’ roll trappings he is as far from yob culture and celebrity sleaze as it’s possible for a rock star to be. He has chart success, critical acclaim and Gwynnie. Now for that difficult third album…

He frequently stalks the streets in a “hoodie” pulled up to disguise his face, and has been in trouble for the occasional scuffle. Chris Martin would not, presumably, be welcome at the Bluewater shopping centre.
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Coldplay delivers hot club show

TORONTO - If the amount of hype surrounding next month’s release of Coldplay’s “X&Y” is to be believed, the band’s third studio album will be its biggest triumph and quite possibly the best record of the year.

And for 75-minutes at the Kool Haus last night, the current, past and future darlings of Brit-Pop let Torontonians know the hype is real.

Opening with “Square One,” the first track on “X&Y,” Coldplay treated fans to the lyrical ambiguities that colour the new album.

“From the top of your first page/ To the end of the last page/ From the start in your own way/ You just want somebody listening to what you say,” singer Chris Martin wailed as he attacked the piano, backed by the rocking extravaganza of Jon Buckland’s U2-esque riff and Guy Berryman’s slow-burning bass line.
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Oh joy! Oh rapture! Oh pleasure in large amounts!

Springtime is finally here! I simply ADORE it when the clouds part and the sun shines down on the little village of North Londonshire On The Wold. It seems almost as if the whole world has been wrapped in a really fluffy yellow towel made of pure sunshine. It’s a clean towel, with the smell of freshly-mown lawns on it, from some really expensive fabric softener that Gwyneth got in Harrods, only the other day.
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Much brings in truffle maker for aficionado Martin

To the visible delight of half of British pop-rockers Coldplay, an Oshawa-based pastry chef showed up at MuchMusic studios last night ready to show frontman Chris Martin and guitarist Jonny Buckland the fine art of truffle making.

“My dreams have come true,” Martin told Much VJ Leah Miller in front of hundreds of teenage fans during last night’s MuchOnDemand segment. “It’s the only job I would trade music for.”

Martin and Buckland, in Toronto to promote the band’s forthcoming third disc X&Y, two days before a sold-out show at the Kool Haus, watched gleefully as chef Ross Sedgwick demonstrated the proper use of an icing bag. Buckland, 27, caught on instantly; chocolate aficionado Martin, 28, needed some assistance.

“I feel so traumatized,” Martin, 28, laughed before giving it another go. “This feels weird, it’s like a whole new career for me.”

Not to worry, Martin and Buckland have no plans on giving up their main jobs, which managed to ground Yonge Street traffic when they later performed an acoustic set at 102.1 The Edge studios.

With global sales of Coldplay’s 2000 debut Parachutes and 2002 follow-up A Rush Of Blood To The Head – along with the Coldplay Live 2003 CD/DVD set – reaching the 16 million mark, a lot appears to be riding on X&Y, due out June 7. In recent interviews with NME and Q, Martin comes across as nervous and self-conscious about how fans will react to the forthcoming material. Yet from Martin and Buckland’s relaxed, down-to-Earth vibe last night, success hasn’t affected them.

“We’re actually very arrogant,” Martin joked. “No really, whenever we go home we’re reminded of how normal life should be. Our mums would say things like, ‘Before you go to the Grammys, don’t forget about washing up.”

May 9, 2005

(Cold Play, May 9, 2005) (”MuchOnDemand” theme) (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: HEY, WHAT’S GOING ON? WELCOME BACK TO “MuchOnDemand.” COLDPLAY’S RIGHT HERE. GUYS, COME ON DOWN. NO ONE CAN HEAR WITH ALL THE NOISE. (Continued applause and cheering)

> Matte: HOLY SMOKES! HOW YOU DOING, GUYS? IT’S GREAT TO HAVE YOU HERE. THIS IS OUR MAGIC LINE RIGHT HERE. (Continued applause and cheering)

> Matte: WE’RE GOING TO GO OUT THERE IN A LITTLE BIT.

> HOLY MOLY!

> Matte: I KNOW. IT WAS KIND OF FUNNY; I WAS SAYING IT EARLIER. ALL THESE GIRLS IN THE BUILDING HAD AN EXTRA BOUNCE IN THEIR STEP. IN THE HALLWAYS, IT WAS DIFFERENT. IT WAS LIKE A FEVER GOING AROUND. (Applause)

> Matte: ANYWAY, GUYS–

> I CAN’T GET MY HEAD AROUND THERE. THANKS FOR COMING OUT, EVERYBODY.

> Matte: I KNOW. (Applause and cheering)

> ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TURN AROUND.

> Matte: I’VE GOT TO TELL YOU, GUYS, I WENT TO HEAR THE ALBUM A LITTLE WHILE AGO– A WEEK AGO. I’VE GOT TO TELL YOU, IT’S A FANTASTIC ALBUM. YOU GUYS WHIPPED UP– (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: IT’S REALLY EXCITING. I REALLY LIKE “FIX YOU,” ACTUALLY, ON THE ALBUM.

> THANKS.

> Matte: THAT WAS A GREAT TRACK. NOW, I HEARD YOU GUYS WENT THROUGH A TON OF STUFF ACTUALLY DOING THE ALBUM. IT WAS A LOT OF HARD WORK, AN EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER, SO TO SPEAK. I WAS WONDERING IF YOU GUYS COULD TAKE ME THROUGH THE UPS AND DOWNS OF IT ALL WHEN YOU GUYS WERE RECORDING.

> WELL–

> I CAN’T THINK OF ANYTHING EXCEPT HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE STANDING BEHIND ME.

> Matte: I KNOW, EH?

> UM– (Applause)

> WELL, IT WAS HARD, YOU KNOW. BUT JUDGING BY THE ENTRANCE, IT WAS WORTH IT. (Applause and cheering) (Laughter)

> Matte: OH, MY GOD!

> WE DON’T MIND– WE DON’T MIND IF IT’S A BIT DIFFICULT IF, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE ARE THAT FRIENDLY. IT’S WORTH IT.

> Matte: NOW, YOU GUYS ACTUALLY DID A BUNCH OF SONGS, RECORDED THEM, THEN WENT AND SAID, “THESE THINGS AREN’T UP TO PAR FOR OUR STANDARDS,” AND ACTUALLY KEPT RECORDING. IS THAT WHAT HAPPENED?

> YEAH, THAT’S WHAT ALWAYS HAPPENS WITH US. WE DO SOMETHING AND THINK IT’S BRILLIANT, AND THEN WE PLAY FOR SOMEONE ELSE AND THEY REMIND US THAT IT PROBABLY ISN’T BRILLIANT. SO WE TAKE IT BACK IN AND WE WORK ON IT, AND THEN WE PLAY IT AGAIN AND THEN WE DON’T THINK IT’S BRILLIANT. THEN TWO YEARS LATER, IT ALL COMES OKAY.

> Matte: WELL, YOU GUYS HAVE SAID IT BEFORE, RIGHT: NOTHING COMES EASY.

> NOTHING COMES EASY.

> NOT FOR US, ANYWAY.

> YOU DON’T GET A BODY LIKE THAT WITHOUT WORK. (Laughter)

> YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

> Matte: WELL–

> OR A HAIRCUT LIKE THIS.

> Matte: OR A HAIRCUT? HEY, I’M JUST TRYING TO KEEP UP.

> OKAY.

> Matte: IT’S KIND OF FUNNY BECAUSE SOME THINGS DO, HOWEVER. NOW, I READ THAT ONE NIGHT THE SANDMAN, SO TO SPEAK, ACTUALLY BROUGHT YOU MORE THAN JUST DREAMS. HE ACTUALLY BROUGHT YOU A SONG OR A MESSAGE, SO TO SPEAK. IS THAT A TRUE STORY?

> WELL, THIS IS A TRUE– IT IS A BIT BORING STORY– NOT REALLY A BORING STORY. IT’S QUITE– IT INVOLVES US BEING NAKED.

> Matte: SO IS NUDITY. NUDITY IS ALWAYS GOOD RIGHT HERE. NUDITY IS ALWAYS GOOD. (Applause and cheering)

> WE– (Laughing) –WE WERE KIND OF– TWO DAYS TO GO ON OUR RECORD, AND WE KNEW WE WERE MISSING ONE SONG. WE HAVE ONE IDEA LEFT, AND ME AND JONNY HAD BEEN PLAYING. AND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT, IT JUST CAME TO MY HEAD. SO I RUN DOWNSTAIRS, AND IT’S THE ONLY SONG WE EVER WROTE WITH NO CLOTHES ON.

> Matte: YOU AND JON NAKED TOGETHER?

> NO, HE WASN’T NAKED.

> I WASN’T THERE. (Applause) (Laughter)

> SEE, EVERYONE’S EXCITED SEEING ME NAKED. HASN’T HE GOT A GREAT BUM? (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: LEAH’S TRYING TO GET A PEEP OVER THERE. I SAW HER HEAD GO AROUND, TOO.

> MINE ISN’T SO GOOD BUT– (Cheering)

> Matte: NOW AS WELL, NOT ONLY THE RECORDING PART BUT, JON, YOU HAD SAID– YOU GUYS MADE ME GO BLANK THERE. THERE’S SO MUCH SCREAMING GOING ON BACK HERE. (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: SORRY, I WENT BLANK AGAIN THERE. NOW, WHILE YOU GUYS WERE PLAYING THE SONG– I KNOW, EH? THE BUM TALK, THE NAKED TALK, I GOT PEOPLE SCREAMING BACK HERE.

> IT ALL SOUNDS VERY SEXY.

> Matte: I’M PICTURING TWO GUYS NAKED. NOW, YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN REALLY BUSY. YOU GUYS HAVE PENNED A BUNCH OF SONGS, AS WELL FOR OTHER PEOPLE. NOW, WHAT I WAS WONDERING WAS: WHEN YOU GUYS ARE ACTUALLY DOING THE SONGS, RIGHT, AND YOU ACTUALLY GIVE THIS THING– ‘CAUSE YOUR MUSIC’S VERY PERSONAL, RIGHT?

> UH-HUH, RIGHT.

> Matte: AND YOU GUYS GIVE IT TO SOMEONE ELSE TO SING, HOW DOES THAT FEEL? IS THAT LIKE GIVING YOUR BABY? ARE YOU GUYS PRECIOUS TO THINGS LIKE THAT?

> WE ONLY GIVE OUR–

> DON’T SAY IT. YOU’RE ABOUT TO SAY SOMETHING YOU’RE GOING TO REGRET.

> NO, NO, WE–

> ONE OF THE SONGS WE GAVE AWAY WAS ABOUT BEING A GIRL. SO WE DIDN’T REALLY THINK WE COULD PULL THAT OFF OURSELVES.

> YEAH, WE GIVE AWAY SONGS THAT WE DON’T THINK WE PULLED OFF WELL ENOUGH.

> IF YOU WRITE A SONG ABOUT, YOU KNOW, A HARDCORE MOTHER CRUNCHER– (Laughter)

> YOU KNOW SOME– IN A GANG. YOU KNOW, WE CAN’T– WE DON’T REALLY LOOK LIKE THAT, SO WE CAN’T SING IT. THE SAME WHEN WE WROTE A SONG FOR JAMELIA. DO YOU KNOW WHO JAMELIA IS?

> Matte: YES, YES.

> OKAY. SO IT WAS A SONG IN ENGLAND, AND SHE’S THIS– SHE’S THIS GREAT YOUNG SINGER. (Applause and cheering) AND THEY KNOW HER OUTSIDE BUT NOT INSIDE. (Applause and cheering)

> ANYWAY, SO WE HAD A SONG ALL ABOUT BEING A GIRL, LIKE BEING SWEATING AND LIKING THIS GUY AND HE DOESN’T– SO I THOUGHT, “WELL, IF WE COME BACK AND USE THAT AS OUR FIRST SINGLE, PEOPLE ARE GOING TO BE CONFUSED AND THINK THAT WE’VE MAYBE GONE A LITTLE TRANSVESTITE.” BUT– WHICH WOULDN’T BE A PROBLEM, BUT WE THOUGHT IT BEST– IT WOULD BE BETTER FOR HER.

> Matte: NICE.

> YOU KNOW.

> Matte: AND IS IT– OH, WE’VE GOT A BAG OF TRUTHS. WHAT WE HAVE HERE IS A BAG OF TRUTHS. NOW IN THIS BAG OF TRUTHS, THERE IS A BUNCH OF RANDOM THINGS AND SAYINGS AND WORDS, AND IT’S ALL IN ASSOCIATION–

> OKAY.

> Matte: SO WE’RE GOING TO LET YOU DO THE HONOURS, JONNY.

> OKAY.

> Matte: AND YOU JUST PICK OUT A WORD AND THEN YOU GUYS HAVE TO SAY WHAT COMES TO MIND OR EXPLAIN IT. JUST ONE, THOUGH.

> I LIKE– CAN YOU SHOW THE BAG? I LIKE– WHO MADE THAT BAG? IT’S LIKE A SICK BAG. (Applause)

> WITH ALL THE– THIS IS WHAT WE GIVE PEOPLE AT OUR CONCERTS.

> Matte: YEAH, I DON’T– YOU COULD DO THAT.

> IF THEY GET IN TROUBLE.

> Matte: MAYBE WE COULD START SELLING THESE THINGS.

> ON AEROPLANES. THAT’S WHAT WE SHOULD HAVE ON OUR AEROPLANES.

> IT’S FEARS AND PHOBIAS.

> FEARS AND PHOBIAS.

> Matte: YES. SO YOU GUYS EACH HAVE A FEAR OR PHOBIA?

> I’M SCARED OF HEIGHTS. I’VE GOT VERTIGO.

> Matte: REALLY?

> YEAH, I HATE THEM. I CAN’T STAND THEM.

> Matte: THAT’S– REALLY? SO DO YOU FLY? DO YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEMS OF FLYING?

> JONNY, THEY ALL SAY, “AH, MAN.”

> IT’S LOVELY, THANKS.

> Matte: NO PROBLEMS FLYING AT ALL?

> NOT SO MUCH FLYING, MORE SORT OF OPEN SPACE.

> SO YOU DON’T LIKE IT WHEN I SET YOU OUT–

> NO.

> I DON’T TAKE YOU OUT SAILING.

> Matte: WHAT ABOUT YOU, CHRIS?

> I FEAR YOUNG CANADIAN GIRLS. (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: FOR GOOD REASON! WITH GOOD REASON.

> YEAH. ESPECIALLY WHEN THERE’S LIKE 900 OF THEM BEHIND YOU. (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: AND STARING AT YOU THE WAY THEY ARE.

> WHAT DO I FEAR? I FEAR– WHAT DO I FEAR? I FEAR JONNY TELLING ME I’VE BEEN AN IDIOT.

> Matte: YEAH?

> I FEAR ANYONE TELLING ME I’VE BEEN AN IDIOT. I FEAR TROUSERS THAT ARE TOO LONG.

> Matte: WHAT ABOUT TOO TIGHT?

> NO, TOO TIGHT’S NO PROBLEM.

> Matte: TOO TIGHT’S NO PROBLEM, EH?

> IT’S NO PROBLEM. WHEN YOU’VE GOT LEGS LIKE GISELE, YOU DON’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT.

> Matte: ALL RIGHT. RIGHT NOW, WE’RE GOING TO GET TO ONE OF YOUR VIDEOS.

> IT DOESN’T MATTER.

> Matte: WHAT? NO, IT’S ALL GOOD. RIGHT NOW, WE’RE GOING TO GET TO THE VIDEO “CLOCKS.” WE’LL BE BACK IN A LITTLE BIT. (Applause and cheering) (Playing video) (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: HEY, WHAT’S GOING ON? WELCOME BACK TO “MuchOnDemand.” WE’RE STILL HERE WITH COLDPLAY, CHRIS AND JONNY. (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: NOW IT’S A WAITING GAME. WAITING FOR EVERYBODY TO SUBSIDE.

> THANKS.

> Matte: NOW, WE’RE GOING TO PLAY A LITTLE GAME HERE. OKAY? IT’S CALLED “LOST IN TRANSATLANTIC.” SO I’M GOING TO SAY, WHAT I THINK YOU GUYS SAY IN THE U.K.

> IS THIS GOING TO BE LIKE CONTRARY, ABUSIVE TOWARDS US?

> Matte: NO, NOT AT ALL; NOT AT ALL, NOT AT ALL. I JUST THOUGHT SOME OF THESE THINGS WERE FUNNY. SO I’M GOING TO SAY WHAT I THINK YOU GUYS SAY IN THE U.K.; CORRECT ME IF I’M WRONG.

> OKAY.

> Matte: AND YOU GUYS, WE’LL SAY WHAT WE SAY IN CANADA.

> OKAY, SURE.

> Matte: AND I’M SURE YOU GUYS WILL CORRECT THEM IF THEY’RE WRONG.

> I’M SURE THEY WILL.

> Matte: WHICH I’M SURE YOU GUYS WON’T BE.

> WITH A BARRAGE OF NOISE.

> Matte: OKAY. YOU SAY BLOWER– (Laughing)

> IN WHAT CONTEXT? (Laughter)

> Matte: I DON’T KNOW! I DON’T KNOW! YOU GUYS SAY BLOWER.

> MAYBE IN THE LATE-NIGHT ATMOSPHERE. (Laughter)

> Matte: I WAS THINKING–

> YOU MEAN– YOU MEAN TELEPHONE, RIGHT?

> Matte: YES, I WAS THINKING MORE ALONG THE LINES OF PHONE.

> DON’T WE CALL IT THE DOG AND BONE?

> YOU DO, ‘CAUSE YOU’RE FROM LONDON.

> YEAH.

> YOU KNOW WHAT COCKNEY RHYMING SLANG IS? COCKNEY RHYMING SLANG?

> Matte: OKAY, NO.

> SO THAT APPLES– SEE, THEM OUTSIDE, THEY KNOW A LOT MORE THAN YOU DO.

> Matte: THEY KNOW WHAT’S GOING ON.

> IT’S A WHOLE SYSTEM INVENTED IN EAST LONDON ABOUT– YOU CALL– WHAT DID YOU CALL IT? WHAT ELSE IS THERE? APPLES AND PEARS FOR STAIRS OR YOUR BONNET FAIR IS YOUR HAIR.

> Matte: OKAY.

> THINGS LIKE THAT.

> Matte: YOU SOUND A LITTLE LIKE SNOOP DOGG RIGHT NOW, ACTUALLY, WITH YOUR RHYMING, DOING THE THING.

> WELL, MAYBE A LITTLE BIT. (Laughter)

> I WISH I WAS A LITTLE BIT MORE LIKE SNOOP DOGG.

> Matte: OKAY. OKAY, JONNY. YOU SAY TO TAKE THE PISS? WE SAY–

> A LOT OF THESE HAVE A FEW MEANINGS WHERE WE COME FROM.

> MAKE FUN OF?

> Matte: THAT’S WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR, YEAH.

> YOU– PEOPLE REALLY SAY THE PHRASE MAKE FUN OF?

> Matte: YEAH, HE WAS MAKING FUN OF ME.

> YOU MUST HAVE SOME BETTER WORD THAN THAT.

> Matte: HE’S KIND OF NERDY. WHAT, HE’S CLOWNING ME, THINGS LIKE THAT, BUT, YEAH.

> HE WAS ALL UP IN MY FACE.

> Matte: YES. (Laughter)

> Matte: HE WAS ALL IN MY GRILL, MAYBE.

> HE WAS ALL IN MY GRILL?

> Matte: OKAY.

> THAT’S WHAT I SAY.

> Matte: YOU SAY–

> WHAT IS YOUR GRILL?

> Matte: MY GRILL? FACE, PROBABLY.

> IT’S PART OF FOOTBALL, RIGHT?

> Matte: YEP, UP IN MY GRILL.

> ALL RIGHT. SOMETIMES YOU GET UP IN MY GRILL. (Laughter) (Applause and cheering)

> AND I GET UP IN YOURS. BUT IT’S A WHOLE WORLD OF FUN.

> Matte: YOU GUYS SAY SHAG?

> WE DO.

> Matte: WE SAY… MAYBE WE SHOULDN’T–

> I’M NOT SURE WHAT TIME IT IS. (Laughter)

> Matte: YOU SAY BANGERS. WE SAY…

> SAUSAGE.

> Matte: SAUSAGE IS WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR.

> OKAY.

> Matte: OKAY. NOW THAT’S GOOD.

> YOU DON’T WANT TO GO AROUND ENGLAND SAYING THESE TOO MUCH, BY THE WAY.

> Matte: WHY?

> JUST BE CAREFUL WHO YOU SAY THESE STUFF TO.

> Matte: OKAY.

> IF YOU SAY YOU WANT TO GO SHAG BANGERS, YOU MIGHT BE IN TROUBLE.

> Matte: IT WOULDN’T WORK, EH?

> YOU WANT TO GO– YEAH.

> AND THEN HAVE A BLOWER.

> Matte: NOW LISTEN…

> YOU CAN’T SAY THAT. (Laughter)

> Matte: NOW, JONNY, I WAS WONDERING IF YOU COULD TELL US HERE BECAUSE IT’S BEEN RUMORED THAT CHRIS ACTUALLY HAS SOME USHER MOVES. (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: JONNY, CAN YOU CONFIRM THAT?

> HE CAN’T CONFIRM IT.

> THEY’RE A LITTLE BIT MORE JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE THAN USHER.

> A LITTLE BIT MORE J.T.

> Matte: YEAH?

> THE THING ABOUT USHER IS YOU CAN PLAY CHESS ON HIS STOMACH. WHEREAS WITH MINE, YOU CAN JUST ROLL THE BALL. YOU PROBABLY CAN DO ANYTHING ON MY STOMACH.

> Matte: ROLL THE BALL. BUT THERE’S GOT TO BE AT LEAST THE– IT FUNNELS DOWN SOMEWHERE, RIGHT?

> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

> Matte: THE BELLYBUTTON, THE BELLYBUTTON.

> OH, I– WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? MUSCLES OR HAIR?

> Matte: INNIE OR OUTIE?

> I CAN’T– I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

> Matte: OKAY. SEE, AN INNIE WOULD BE A BELLYBUTTON THAT POKES OUT, AND– THAT’S AN OUTIE, SORRY. AN INNIE FUNNELS IN. SO I FIGURED–

> WHAT HAVE YOU GOT?

> I’VE GOT AN INNIE.

> OUR POINT IS, WE DON’T HAVE THE SAME KIND OF USHER STOMACH.

> Matte: YEAH.

> YOU KNOW, HE’S GOT THAT WHOLE CHEST THING GOING.

> Matte: THE WHOLE PHYSIQUE, THE WHOLE BODY.

> THAT’S WHY HE’S GOT THOSE MOVES. WE TRY AND HAVE THOSE MOVES, BUT EVERYONE ALWAYS TEASES US FOR NOT HAVING ANY SUCH MOVES.

> Matte: DO YOU GUYS HAVE– DO YOU GUYS HAVE A COUPLE?

> WE DO HAVE A COUPLE.

> Matte: YOU GUYS HAVE A COUPLE? (Applause and cheering) (Laughter)

> Matte: NO, NO. WE’RE JUST GOING TO GO OVER TO THE WINDOW. WE’VE GOT PEOPLE WAITING OUTSIDE, SO LET’S GO TO THE WINDOW AND SAY WHAT’S UP TO THE PEOPLE OUTSIDE.

> I’M– (Continued applause and cheering)

> Matte: WE’VE GOT QUITE A FEW PEOPLE OVER HERE. I’VE HONESTLY NEVER SEEN PEOPLE ACROSS THE STREET LIKE THIS BEFORE. IT’S PRETTY CRAZY. (Applause and cheering)

> HOW YOU DOING? HOW YOU DOING?

> Matte: WE’RE GOING TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK. I GUESS YOU GUYS ARE SIGNING AUTOGRAPHS, TAKING TENS OF ZILLIONS PICTURES. WE’LL BE BACK AFTER THE BREAK, GUYS. STICK AROUND. (Applause and cheering) (”MuchOnDemand” theme)

> Matte: WELCOME BACK. WE’RE HERE WITH COLDPLAY. YOUR SHOW AT THE KOOLHAUS SOLD OUT IN A MINUTE.

> RIGHT.

> Matte: A MINUTE FLAT. SO WHAT WE DID IS WE GOT SOME SETS OF TICKETS, AND WE’RE ACTUALLY GOING TO GIVE AWAY SOME TICKETS RIGHT NOW TO THE AUDIENCE. (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: I’M GOING TO WAIT UNTIL THEY’VE SUBSIDED. (Loud applause continues)

> Matte: SO WHAT I NEED IS FOR YOU GUYS TO THINK OF TWO SETS. JON, YOU CAN THINK OF A TRIVIA QUESTION. CHRIS, YOU TOO. THEN YOU’LL EACH GIVE AWAY ONE SET. (Applause and cheering)

> OKAY.

> Matte: YOU CAN MAKE IT EASY, JUST AN EASY TRIVIA QUESTION ABOUT YOU GUYS TO GIVE AWAY THOSE TICKETS.

> JUST DO IT NOW?

> Matte: YES.

> ONE QUESTION OR TWO QUESTIONS?

> Matte: ONE QUESTION EACH.

> I’D LIKE TO KNOW–

> Matte: IT KIND OF PUTS YOU ON THE SPOT BUT–

> BY CRACKY.

> Matte: ARE YOU GUYS LISTENING; ARE YOU LISTENING? YOU’VE GOT TO BE QUIET SO EVERYONE CAN HEAR.

> WHAT’S THE NAME OF THE MOST VALUABLE PLAYER IN BASKETBALL? (Yelling and screaming)

> Matte: I HAVE TO BE BACK HERE EVERY DAY.

> SHOULD I MAKE IT A HARDER QUESTION?

> Matte: NO, THAT’S GOOD. YOU HAVE TO PICK SOMEBODY. (Guests speaking simultaneously)

> Matte: I’M NOT DOING IT! THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE.

> OKAY, OKAY. LET ME ASK A COUPLE OF QUESTIONS. WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION GOING TO BE, JON?

> HOW OLD IS GUY BERRYMAN?

> YEAH, HOW OLD IS GUY BERRYMAN?

> Matte: HOW OLD IS–

> 23!

> 27!

> RIGHT THERE. HE’S 27. (Applause)

> HE’S 27.

> Matte: NEXT, QUICKLY, GUYS. WE’VE GOT TO GET TO THE NEWS. THE NEXT QUESTION?

> THE NEXT QUESTION IS: WHAT IS THE SECOND WORD IN THE BAND NAMED ARCADE? (Loud screaming)

> Matte: OKAY, THAT WAS GOOD.

> I’M SORRY.

> Matte: RIGHT NOW, WE’RE GOING TO GET TO THE NEWS, PART OF THE SHOW. (MuchNews)

> Matte: HEY, WHAT’S GOING ON? COLDPLAY IS SIGNING AUTOGRAPHS BY THE DOZEN. BEFORE WE HIT THE BREAK, I JUST WANT TO ASK…

> CHILL, CHILL, CHILL!

> Matte: SO I’M NERVOUS ABOUT THE INTERVIEW. I’M THINKING, “WHAT AM I GOING TO ASK THESE GUYS?” RIGHT? I’M THINKING, “WHEN YOU’RE JUST A BAND COMING UP–”

> HE’S A SEX SYMBOL, LOOK AT THAT.

> Matte: HE IS, EH? IT’S ALL IN THE BOOTY. AND AS YOU’RE COMING UP, YOU’RE JUST ABLE TO MAKE MUSIC, RIGHT? BUT NOW, HAVING GROWN TO THE MAGNITUDE YOU GUYS HAVE, CAN YOU JUST STILL MAKE MUSIC?

> …MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD GETTING ALL THIS ATTENTION. ISN’T THAT AMAZING?

> Matte: THE COMRADERY BETWEEN YOU GUYS IS FABULOUS, AS WELL.

> HE’S MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD. EVERYBODY LOVES HIM VERY MUCH.

> Matte: ARE ALL YOU GUYS BEST FRIENDS?

> EH?

> Matte: ARE ALL YOU GUYS THIS CLOSE?

> WE’RE THE CLOSEST. THE OTHER TWO, THEY DON’T LIKE US AT ALL.

> THEY’RE VERY CLOSE, YES.

> Matte: ALL RIGHT, GUYS. WE’LL HAVE MORE WITH COLDPLAY AFTER THE BREAK. STICK AROUND.

> Okay. (Applause and cheering) (”MuchOnDemand” theme)

> Leah: WELCOME BACK TO “MuchOnDemand.” I’M HANGING OUT WITH CHRIS AND JONNY FROM COLDPLAY. I’M ALSO JOINED BY ROSS HERE FROM NUTTY CHOCOLATIER.

> HI, HOW ARE YOU?

> NICE TO MEET YOU.

> Leah: NOW, CHRIS–

> NICE TO MEET YOU.

> Leah: NOW, I HEARD THAT YOU REALLY LIKE CHOCOLATE.

> YOU OBVIOUSLY KNOW. THIS IS MY DREAM COME TRUE.

> Leah: SEE, THAT’S WHY I BROUGHT IT FOR YOU.

> THIS IS HOW I WOULD DECORATE MY WHOLE HOUSE.

> Leah; “WILLY WONKA,” DO YOU LIKE THAT MOVIE?

> OF COURSE I LIKE THAT MOVIE.

> Leah: OF COURSE, RIGHT? WE’RE ACTUALLY GOING TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE TRUFFLES TODAY.

> WOW!

> Leah: ARE YOU EXCITED, JONNY?

> IS THIS YOUR JOB? SERIOUSLY, IS THIS YOUR JOB?

> PART OF IT.

> WOW! (Laughter)

> SO YOU WORK WITH CHOCOLATE EVERY DAY? THAT’S MAYBE THE ONLY JOB I’D TRADE WITH.

> I DON’T SING.

> WELL, THERE WE GO THEN. I DON’T MAKE CHOCOLATE.

> Leah: SO WHAT ARE WE GOING TO LEARN RIGHT NOW?

> THIS IS MY DREAM COME TRUE.

> WE’RE GOING TO LEARN HOW TO MAKE CHOCOLATE TRUFFLES. RIGHT NOW, I’VE GOT EVERYTHING SET UP. SO THIS IS A TRUFFLE MIX, AND ALL WE DO IS PIPE IT IN ON THE TRAYS. WE SET THEM UP, AND THEN WE DIP THEM AND PUT SOME CHOCOLATE SHAVINGS ON THEM.

> Leah: ARE YOU READY, CHRIS? ARE YOU READY TO TRY?

> WE ALWAYS KNEW WE’D END UP ON A COOKERY PROGRAM.

> Leah: ISN’T THIS EXCITING?

> WE ALWAYS KNEW IT WAS OUR FATE TO BE ON A TV COOKERY PROGRAM.

> Leah: I DID THIS FOR YOU.

> IT’S BRILLIANT! IT’S AMAZING!

> Leah: CHOCOLATE FOR YOU. DO YOU WANT TO DO IT? DO YOU WANT TO MAKE ONE?

> A HUNDRED PERCENT.

> Leah: OKAY. SO LET’S SHOW US HOW TO DO IT.

> CAN I PUT MY MIC DOWN?

> Leah: YES. DO YOU WANT US TO HOLD IT? YEAH, JONNY DOESN’T WANT TO DO IT.

> OKAY. I STOLE SOMEONE’S PEN BY THE WAY. I’M SORRY. OKAY, LET’S DO IT. SHOW ME.

> HOLD THE BAG, RIGHT?

> YEAH.

> AND JUST PIPE IT UP.

> Leah: IT LOOKS SIMPLE, RIGHT, CHRIS?

> IT LOOKS INCREDIBLY BRILLIANT.

> Leah: ARE YOU EXCITED?

> I COULDN’T BE MORE EXCITED IF YOU GAVE ME A BANANA. SO CAN I DO MY OWN SHAPE?

> Leah: YEAH.

> OH, THIS FEELS ODD.

> Leah: OKAY. (Laughter)

> NAH, I DON’T LIKE THIS. I KIND OF MESSED IT UP.

> Leah: DON’T WORRY. YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN. START DOWN HERE.

> IT FEELS REALLY WEIRD TO ME.

> Leah: YOU’LL GET THE HANG OF IT, CHRIS. IT’S OKAY. IT’S NEW FOR YOU.

> SOMETIMES– I’VE GONE ALL RED, YOU SEE. I’M EMBARRASSED.

> Leah: IT’S THE HEAT.

> NOBODY’S GOING TO BUY THAT.

> Leah: WHY?

> IT LOOKS TERRIBLE!

> Leah: IT’S A NEW CAREER. COME ON, TRY!

> OKAY.

> Leah: OKAY, JONNY? COME HERE! (Applause and cheering)

> NO, MAN.

> ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

> LET JONNY HAVE A GO.

> Leah: OKAY. ARE YOU TRAUMATIZED, CHRIS? ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU TRAUMATIZED?

> I’M PRETTY TRAUMATIZED.

> Leah: YOU’RE USING TWO MICS; I LOVE IT!

> THIS BOY’S A GENIUS. LOOK AT THAT.

> Leah: WOW! (Applause and cheering)

> Leah: JONNY! HOW DOES IT FEEL?

> IT FEELS– IT FEELS KIND OF WEIRD. (Laughter)

> THAT LOOKS AMAZING. HOW MUCH DO THESE COST IN THE SHOPS?

> WHOLESALE, SO IT’S HARD TO JUDGE THE PRICE.

> WOW!

> BUT WE HAVE–

> DON’T TELL ME.

> NO.

> OKAY. IT’S CONFIDENTIAL.

> ONE OF OUR PEOPLE WHO PIPE THESE, SHE–

> ARE THESE ALL SET ALREADY?

> Leah: HE’S GOING ON ALREADY. LOOK, HE LOVES IT.

> CAN WE HAND THEM OUT OR SOMETHING?

> WE’RE GOING TO DIP THEM.

> OKAY. (Applause and cheering)

> I SEE; I SEE.

> Leah: YOUR FAVOURITE CHOCOLATE, CHRIS?

> OKAY. YOU WANT ME TO HOLD YOUR MIC?

> Leah; DO YOU LIKE MILK CHOCOLATE OR– WHAT DO YOU LIKE?

> I CAN’T ADVERTISE ON TV, BUT MY FAVOURITE IS MARS BARS.

> Leah: MILK CHOCOLATE– I FEEL LIKE I CAN’T ADVERTISE HERE— MY FAVOURITE ONE.

> CHOCOLATE’S LIKE GIRLS. YOU KNOW, THEY’RE ALL PRETTY GREAT. (Applause and cheering)

> Leah: VERY, VERY TRUE. RIGHT NOW, WE’RE ACTUALLY GOING TO TAKE– AND BANDS.

> Leah: GIRLS AND BANDS. WE’RE GOING TO–

> CHRISTINE FROM BRAMPTON’S ON THE PHONE. DO YOU WANT TO TAKE THAT CALL? OH, I SEE.

> Leah: CHRISTINE, HOW ARE YOU?

> A BIT TOO MUCH.

> Caller: HEY, I’M DOING GREAT. HOW ARE YOU GUYS?

> OH, WELL, RETURN YOUR MIC.

> Leah: GREAT.

> Caller: AWESOME!

> Leah: WHAT’S YOUR QUESTION FOR COLDPLAY?

> Caller: MY QUESTION IS WITH YOU GUYS BEING HUGELY SUCCESSFUL AND ENORMOUSLY FAMOUS AS YOU ARE, HOW DO YOU GUYS MANAGE TO KEEP YOUR SANITY AND STAY HUMBLE?

> WELL, ACTUALLY, WE’RE VERY ARROGANT AND WE– (Laughter)

> WE’RE NOT HUMBLE AT ALL. OFTEN JONNY WILL CALL ME AND SAY, “I’M BRILLIANT, AREN’T I, CHRIS?” AND I’LL SAY, “YES, JONNY, YOU ARE AND I AM, TOO, AND I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH.”

> WELL DONE!

> WELL DONE. SO WE’VE MADE NO ATTEMPT TO STAY HUMBLE.

> Caller: YOU GUYS ARE GREAT.

> BUT IN ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION, SERIOUSLY, YOU KNOW, WHEN WE GO HOME AND SEE OUR FAMILIES, WHATEVER, THEY REMIND US THAT WE’RE VERY NORMAL IDIOTS AND– YOU KNOW, IT’S VERY HUMBLING TO BE TOLD BY YOUR MUM WHEN YOU’VE WON A GRAMMY TO GO DO THE WASHING UP OR SOMETHING; GO DO THE DISHES. (Applause and cheering)

> IT KEEPS YOU GROUNDED. SO I HOPE THAT ANSWERS YOUR QUESTION, CHRISTINE BRAMPTON.

> Caller: THAT’S PERFECT.

> FROM BRAMPTON. (Laughter)

> Leah: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR CALLING, CHRISTINE.

> THANKS, CHRISTINE.

> Leah: DO YOU WANT TO TRY SOME OF THE CHOCOLATE, CHRIS?

> DID SHE ASK HER PARENTS’ PERMISSION TO MAKE THAT CALL?

> Leah: I’M NOT SURE. DO YOU HAVE TO DO THAT IN ENGLAND?

> I DON’T WANT TO ENCOURAGE YOUR ADVICE.

> Leah: THAT’S GOOD– IT ISN’T ADVICE, THOUGH.

> ARE YOU ALLOWED TO JUST CALL IN AND SPEAK TO COLDPLAY?

> Leah: YEAH.

> WOULD YOU HAVE BEEN ALLOWED TO DO THAT WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE GIRL?

> Leah: NO.

> OKAY.

> Leah: BUT YOU GIVE GOOD ADVICE, RIGHT? WHATEVER. WHY DON’T WE EAT SOME CHOCOLATE? RIGHT NOW, WE’RE GOING TO GET TO “YELLOW.” HERE IT IS!

> THANK YOU. (Applause and cheering) (Playing video) (”MuchOnDemand” theme)

> Leah: WELCOME BACK! THAT WAS “YELLOW” BY COLDPLAY. WE’RE HANGING OUT HERE. WE ACTUALLY HANDED OUT THE CHOCOLATE AND HAD SOME.

> THEY WERE GREAT.

> Leah: YOU LIKE THEM?

> YEAH. (Continued applause and cheering)

> Leah: WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE CHOCOLATE?

> I ACTUALLY DID EAT– WE KIND OF SHARED IT BACK THERE. (Applause)

> HOW WAS YOUR CHOCOLATE?

> VERY GOOD.

> AMAZING!

> SO IF YOU WANT GREAT CHOCOLATE, GO TO NUTTY CHOCOLATIER. (Applause and cheering)

> I THINK WE’VE DONE OUR BIT, RIGHT?

> Leah: YOU WERE HILARIOUS.

> JONNY HASN’T QUITE FINISHED HIS, THOUGH. BUT WE MIGHT–

> Leah: I LOVE IT. IT’S OKAY. YOU CAN PUT IT DOWN.

> YOU MIGHT HAVE TO GET THAT SICK BAG BACK OVER HERE.

> Leah: OH, NO! YOU DON’T WANT– THAT HAS YOUR PICTURE ON IT, THOUGH. WOULD YOU– YOU DON’T WANT TO GAG IN THAT.

> NO, NO, NO. BUT ACTUALLY, THESE CHOCOLATES WERE DELICIOUS.

> Leah: WERE THEY? THEN I’M GLAD– I’M GLAD THEY WERE.

> YOU’VE STARTED THROWING SWEETS TO GET FANS.

> I’LL DO ANYTHING.

> HE’LL DO ANYTHING.

> Leah: OKAY. SO–

> LEAH, THANKS A LOT FOR THAT. IT WAS ACTUALLY, ALTHOUGH I SEEMED EMBARRASSED, THAT WAS VERY–

> Leah: DID THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY?

> THAT WAS A GREAT EXPERIENCE. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

> Leah: GOOD. I LIKE CHOCOLATE, TOO, SO I THOUGHT IT WOULD MAKE YOU HAPPY.

> OKAY.

> Leah: GIVE ME CHOCOLATE. NOW, LET’S TALK ABOUT THE MUSIC. LET’S GET AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE.

> I THINK WE SHOULD TALK ABOUT CHOCOLATE.

> Leah: I THINK WE SHOULD TALK ABOUT MUSIC, RIGHT? DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT CHOCOLATE?

> NOT REALLY.

> Leah: EXACTLY, RIGHT? WHATEVER. (Applause and cheering)

> Leah: LYRICALLY, I THINK THAT YOU BLOW AWAY EVERY OTHER BAND. I’M A HUGE FAN OF YOURS.

> WHAT NOW? (Applause and cheering)

> Leah: LYRICALLY– NO, YOU REALLY DO. NO, NOT ONLY YOUR MUSIC–

> WE DON’T REALLY AGREE WITH YOU BUT THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

> Leah: COME ON, CHRIS. NO, YOU DO.

> I THINK IN ALL HONESTY, THE BEST LYRICIST IN THE WORLD IS EMINEM. (Loud applause)

> Leah: I ADORE EMINEM, ABSOLUTELY.

> SO– AND MAYBE JAY-Z. (Applause)

> THOSE TWO, THEY ARE THE BEST IN THE WORLD. BUT IF YOU’RE LOOKING FOR NAMBY-PAMBY SOFT ROCK, SOPPY STUFF, THEN WE’RE YOUR–

> Leah: BUT I LOVE IT. (Loud applause and cheering)

> Leah: IT IS; IT’S THE GREATEST.

> AND SOME BON JOVI, YES.

> Leah: DO YOU LISTEN TO EMINEM?

> WE LISTEN TO EMINEM, OF COURSE, YEAH.

> Leah: YOU AS WELL, JONNY?

> ABSOLUTELY.

> BUT WE LISTEN TO JAY-Z MORE, PROBABLY.

> Leah: DO YOU?

> YEAH, PROBABLY. I KNOW HE’S RETIRED, BUT HE DESERVES PROPS FROM COLDPLAY. (Loud applause and cheering)

> Leah: JAY-Z, YOU’RE GETTING PROPS FROM COLDPLAY RIGHT HERE IN CANADA. NOW ON THE NEW ALBUM–

> YES.

> Leah: “WHAT IF” WAS– LIKE MATTE, I GOT TO LISTEN TO IT THE OTHER WEEK, AND “WHAT IF” IS PROBABLY ONE THAT STRUCK A CHORD MOST IN ME, I THINK. I ONLY GOT TO LISTEN TO IT ONCE BUT THE LYRICS– NOW, EVERYBODY INTERPRETS MUSIC A DIFFERENT WAY. IT’S LIKE ART; IT’S VERY SUBJECTIVE. BUT I TOOK AWAY FROM IT THAT IT’S NICE BECAUSE NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU HAVE, NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, EVERYBODY HAS FEARS; EVERYBODY GOES THROUGH THE SAME THINGS. WE’RE ALL THE SAME.

> WELL, YOU KNOW, THE TRUTH IS WHEN YOU BECOME SORT OF A SEMI-POP STAR, YOU REALIZE– BECAUSE YOU FEEL NO DIFFERENT TO HOW YOU FELT BEFORE AND YOU HAVE THE SAME KIND OF THOUGHTS AND WORRIES AND ANXIETIES AND STRESSES OR WHATEVER, IT MAKES YOU REALIZE THAT MAYBE, YOU KNOW, EVEN THE PRESIDENT– WE’RE ALL IN KIND OF THE SAME BOAT, YOU KNOW. SO THAT SONG YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT, “WHAT IF,” IS ABOUT JUST WHATEVER PERSON YOU ARE– I’M GOING TO SOUND LIKE A MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKER, SO I’M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU EXACTLY WHAT IT’S ABOUT. (Laughter)

> YOU’LL FIND OUT SOON ENOUGH.

> Leah: WHAT WERE YOU THINKING ABOUT WHEN YOU WROTE THE SONG?

> I WAS JUST KIND OF FILLING IN THE GAPS, REALLY.

> Leah: COME ON, JONNY! YOU WERE MORE THAN FILLING IN THE GAPS.

> HE WAS THINKING OF BECOMING A GUITAR HERO.

> YEAH, I WAS, YOU KNOW, WHEN IS MY NEXT SOLO?

> YEAH. (Laughter)

> Leah: THAT’S REALLY GOOD. THAT’S REAL NICE. NOW ON THE ALBUM, WHAT DO YOU THINK IS THE SONG THAT’S MOST CLOSEST TO YOU? WHAT DO YOU FIND IS YOUR FAVOURITE?

> MY FAVOURITE’S A SONG CALLED “FIX YOU.” (Applause and cheering)

> DON’T– NO ONE’S HEARD IT! WHY ARE YOU CLAPPING? IT COULD BE TERRIBLE.

> UNLESS YOU’VE HEARD IT ON THE INTERNET.

> YEAH.

> Leah: IT’S NOT ON THE INTERNET YET. DON’T SAY THAT.

> WELL, YOU’RE BEING VERY NICE TO US, BUT THAT SONG IS PARTICULARLY– BUT THE THING IS, IF WE PUT AN ALBUM OUT, WE’RE KIND OF PROUD OF EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF IT ‘CAUSE THAT’S WHY WE SPENT SO LONG MAKING IT.

> Leah: YEAH.

> WE DON’T REALLY WANT TO CHUCK OUT ONE CHOCOLATE AND NINE PIECES OF COAL. IT’S ALL GOING TO BE CHOCOLATES.

> Leah; SO THEY’RE ALL YOUR FAVOURITE?

> THEY’RE ALL OUR FAVOURITE, EXACTLY.

> BUT WE LIKE THAT ONE ‘CAUSE LIVE IT’S GOT ALL FOUR OF US SINGING.

> WE’VE NEVER ALL SUNG BEFORE. WE THOUGHT, YOU KNOW, “HOW DO THE BACKSTREET BOYS SELL SO MANY RECORDS?” WELL, THEY ALL SING LIVE.

> FOUR-PART HARMONY.

> FOUR-PART HARMONY, SO THAT’S WHAT WE’VE TRIED DOING.

> Leah: THAT’S THE BEST PART. NOW, ANOTHER ONE I LOVE, IT’S ENTITLED– ARE WE ALLOWED TO TELL YOU THERE’S A SECRET SONG ON THE ALBUM? ARE WE ALLOWED TO LET THAT OUT?

> IT’S NOT THE WORST-KEPT SECRET OF ALL TIME.

> Leah: OKAY, YEAH. YOU WAIT 20 SECONDS AND THEN IT COMES ON, RIGHT? LIKE 10 MINUTES LATER. BUT IT HAS A BIT OF FOLKISH SOUND TO IT, I THINK. IT REMINDED ME A LITTLE BIT OF DYLAN.

> OKAY. WELL, YOU KNOW.

> IT WAS A GOOD THING FOR YOU?

> Leah: I LOVE IT.

> GREAT. (Laughter)

> Leah: NO, BUT IT’S DIFFERENT FROM ALL THE REST OF THE SONGS. LIKE WHY DID YOU CHOOSE THAT ONE TO PUT AS THE SECRET SONG?

> I THOUGHT– THE TRUTH IS WE HAD 13 SONGS WE WANTED TO PUT ON THE ALBUM. YOU KNOW, WHAT WITH COMPUTER GAMES AND EVERYTHING, EVERYONE’S ATTENTION SPAN IS PRETTY SHORT. SO WE THOUGHT, “WELL, HOW CAN WE SPLIT UP THIS ONE PIECE OF MUSIC INTO THREE DIFFERENT SECTIONS?” SO WHAT WE DID IS WE PUT SIDE A AND SIDE B–

> Leah: MM-HMM.

> AND THEN A SECRET TRACK, WHICH ISN’T REALLY SECRET AT ALL.

> IT JUST COMES AT THE END.

> IT JUST COMES AT THE END. SO THAT HOPEFULLY PEOPLE DON’T JUST THINK OF IT AS BEING TOO LONG, YOU KNOW. I’M BEING VERY HONEST, AND I’M DESTROYING OUR ALBUM IN THE PROCESS, BUT THAT’S WHY WE DID IT.

> Leah: VERY NICE. SO RIGHT NOW, WE’RE GOING TO TAKE A BREAK.

> OKAY.

> Leah: WE HAVE MORE WITH COLDPLAY– (Loud applause and cheering) (”MuchOnDemand” theme) (Commercial) (”MuchOnDemand” theme)

> Matte: HEY, WHAT’S GOING ON? WELCOME BACK TO “M.O.D.” IT’S FUNNY; WE WERE JUST TALKING IN THE BREAK. CHRIS THOUGHT IT WAS AMAZING THAT THESE KIDS TOOK THE DAY OFF OF SCHOOL TO ACTUALLY COME DOWN AND CHECK IT OUT.

> IN ALL HONESTY, YOU KNOW, IT’S– I MEAN, WE’VE BEEN LOCKED UP IN THE STUDIO FOR BASICALLY TWO YEARS. AND IT’S KIND OF OVERWHELMING TO REALIZE THAT PEOPLE ARE KIND OF PLEASED TO SEE YOU. IT’S– WE’RE VERY GRATEFUL ABOUT THAT, AND A LOT OF PEOPLE HAVE COME FROM MILES, YOU KNOW, MISSED SCHOOL AND STUFF. SO I KNOW IT SOUNDS CHEESY, BUT WE WANT TO SAY THANK YOU. WHAT ELSE CAN WE SAY? (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: IT’S NOT CHEESY AT ALL.

> IT’ OVERWHELMING FOR US. YOU KNOW, WE’RE JUST TWO– WE’RE JUST TWO BOYS WHO GREW UP TOGETHER AND NOW WE’RE DOING ALL THIS; IT’S VERY COOL.

> IT IS.

> Leah: THEY’RE GOING NUTS OUT THERE.

> WELL, QUITE NUTS.

> Leah: QUITE NUTS. NUTTY; THEY’RE NUTTERS!

> THEY’RE GOING NUTS FOR CHOCOLATIER.

> Leah: NUTTY. WE’RE– WE HAVE AN E-MAIL QUESTION.

> OKAY. IS THIS FROM AMANDA– WHAT’S THE NAME OF THAT GIRL?

> Leah: AMANDA FROM BRAMPTON.

> AMANDA BRAMPTON.

> Matte: CHRISTINE FROM BRAMPTON.

> Leah: THIS IS KARI, KARI MINNEAPOLIS.

> KARI. WHY HAVE YOU BLACKED OUT THIS BIT?

> Leah: BECAUSE WE DON’T WANT YOU TO READ IT. NO, I DON’T KNOW WHY THEY DO THAT.

> WHAT DOES IT SAY?

> WE LOOK A BIT PUDGY.

> Leah: CHRIS LIKES CHOCOLATE.

> IS THAT WHAT IT SAYS?

> Leah: YOU LOOK DODGY?

> PUDGY.

> Leah: WHAT’S PUDGY?

> Matte: A LITTLE LIKE CHUBBY.

> WE’VE HAD TOO MANY CHOCOLATES.

> Leah: NO! ANYWAYS, IF YOU WOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT YOU WOULD LOSE ALL PRIVACY THAT YOU ONCE HAD AND WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO WALK DOWN THE STREET WITHOUT BEING HARASSED, WOULD YOU STILL HAVE DONE EVERYTHING YOU’VE DONE? IS IT ALL WORTH IT?

> ACTUALLY, WE HAVE TOTAL– I MEAN, WE HAVE AS MUCH PRIVACY AS WE WANT. I MEAN, WHEN SOMEONE COMES UP TO YOU AND SAYS, “CAN YOU SIGN MY RECORD?”– THAT’S THE BIGGEST– IT’S LIKE SOMEONE COMING UP AND GIVING YOU A KISS, YOU KNOW. IT’S INCREDIBLE.

> I’VE NEVER BEEN HARASSED IN MY LIFE. I’M STILL WAITING TO BE HARASSED.

> Leah: HEY, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, JONNY? I SAW A GIRL GRAB YOUR BUTT. IT’S ALL ABOUT YOUR BUTT TODAY, JONNY. COME ON, MAN.

> OR– ALL OF OUR DREAMS HAVE COME TRUE REALLY. AND WHAT WAS THE QUESTION AGAIN?

> Leah: DO YOU WANT TO TAKE IT?

> IS IT WORTH IT? OF COURSE IT’S WORTH IT! ARE YOU JOKING? WE’VE GOT THIS ONE INCREDIBLE LIFE TO LIVE, AND WE’RE HAVING THE BEST TIME IN THE WORLD. IT’S TOTALLY WORTH IT. (Applause and cheering)

> Matte: THERE’S ANOTHER QUESTION OVER THERE ON THE DESK ABOUT THE TITLE OF YOUR ALBUM. IT WAS AN E-MAIL QUESTION. IT WAS ABOUT THE TITLE OF YOUR ALBUM BEING “X&Y.” THEY SAID, “IS THERE A MATHEMATICAL THEME ON THE ALBUM?”

> LISTEN, WE– YOU WORK WITH THAT GUY ED THE SOCK, CORRECT?

> Matte: EDDIE, YEAH.

> WE TOLD HIM ALL ABOUT THAT, SO I DON’T WANT TO RUIN HIS EXCLUSIVE ‘CAUSE THAT GUY’S TERRIFYING. (Laughter)

> YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES WHEN YOU’RE BEING SPOKEN TO BY A PIECE OF FOOTWEAR, IT CAN REALLY MAKE YOU SCARED.

> Leah: WE’RE GOING TO GO OUTSIDE AND SEE YOUR FANS, AND WE’RE GOING TO STOP THE VOTE-O-MATIC. WHAT VIDEO IS IT? “THE SCIENTIST.” I’M HAPPY BECAUSE IT’S MY FAVOURITE.

> OH, WELL, OKAY. COOL.

> Leah: THEY VOTE ONLINE. LET’S GO OUTSIDE TO ALL THE FANS.

> Matte: WE WON’T BE ABLE TO PLAY THAT VIDEO TODAY.

> Leah: YEAH.

> Matte: WE’LL PLAY IT TOMORROW.

> Leah: ABSOLUTELY. (Applause and cheering)

> Leah: COME ON UP HERE. SAY HELLO TO EVERYBODY.

> THERE’S SO MANY PEOPLE.

> Leah: I KNOW.

> THERE’S PEOPLE ACROSS THE STREET.

> Leah: WE WANT TO THANK EVERYBODY FOR COMING DOWN AND TUNING IN. THANK YOU SO MUCH, COLDPLAY. “X&Y” IS OUT ON JUNE 6th, SO MAKE SURE YOU CHECK IT OUT! CHRIS IS INSIDE. THANK YOU SO MUCH, JONNY.

> Matte: THANKS FOR COMING DOWN. WE REALLY APPRECIATE IT.

> Matte: JONNY, THANKS A LOT. (”MuchOnDemand” theme)